THE HIP HAPPENIN HALLOWEEN
by Freak Apple
Summary: Ax discovers Halloween, so Tobias and Rachel agree to taking him trick or treating. Oh, the fun they will have! Okay, it's done. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
1. The Brilliant Idea

DISCLAIMER: Screw it, I'm gonna be K.A. Applegate for Halloween. Then I'm gonna get a bunch of 1st graders and make them my little Animorphs and I can own THEM!! MUAHAHAHAHAA!!**realizes she sounds like a psychopath and she just scared away several readers**

NOTE: Just a litle piece of nonsense I wrote in the holiday spirit. I will add chapters until Halloween Day. Hehe.

Ax - 

"I want to do it. Tuh." I repeated for the 15th time. I picked up a particularly grotesque rubber face and showed it to Tobias. "Is this horrid creature scary enough? Nuff-uh?"

Tobias laughed. "No Ax, not many people think George Dubya's face is particularly frightening."

"Oh, hey, but check this out." Rachel held up a mask of a monkey. We held the two faces side by side. 

"Oh wow, that's creepy." Tobias observed.

"Yes, the resemblance is uncanny." I commented.

"Can I help you kids?" a voice spoke up behind us. We whirled around, due to the fact that humans only have two eyes facing forward and have little motility. The small, pale store-owner stood behind us, wiping his large corrective lenses on his smoke-gray shirt.

"Nah, just browsing." Rachel said. The man, who's nametag read "Clark" nodded and returned to his position behind the cash register. "That guy is creepy. Wonder if they got a mask of his face?"

Two days earlier I had been watching television when I began to notice that many of the movies and shows all recently had supernatural themes. They all had "ghosts, goblins, witches, and vampires", which were all various types of frightening beings made to scare small children. Then I came upon across the word "Halloween".

"Tobias, what is Halloween?" I had asked.

Tobias proceeded to explain that it was an old tradition that began initially to ward of evil spirits with masks, but evolved into children dressing as something other than themselves for fun. As usual, I found this quite strange and backward. But then Tobias mentioned something else.

Kids dress up in costumes and go to peoples houses to get free candy.

It was then I knew that I wanted to partake in this important human cultural event.

Now Tobias, who had invited Rachel, and I were searching through Party City for a costume for me to wear. I rummaged through several disguises, but all were turned down by Tobias and Rachel.

"How about this one?" I held up bright and attractive garment that shone like the sun. It came with some sort of equally shiny weapon which I assumed had something to do with controlling the heavens or rearranging the solar system, since it had a star on the tip.

"Um, Ax, you probably shouldn't waltz around in a fairy princess get-up." Rachel took the garment from me and set it back on the shelf. When I inquired why, she just made a half-snort, half-laugh noise.

"Oh, Skrit Na!" I exclaimed, pulling down a mask that looked startingly like the Na phase of a race of intergalactic bandits.

"You mean, those things are real aliens?" Tobias asked. 

"Of course. And you humans know about them? I thought you were less informed." I looked at the tag. It read "Alien Adult". 

"Well, a bunch of psychos claimed to be abducted by aliens, and that's what they described them as." Rachel said.

"Skrit Na have been known to visit planets and take various technologies, as well as specimens of life forms. They conduct odd experiments on the specimens for no known purpose, then return them, it's memory fully intact. Mostly." I explained. 

Tobias and Rachel looked at each other then stared at me.

"You learn something knew everyday." Tobias said.

"Jeez. I guess I have to believe all though Bigfoot and Loch Ness Monster stuff now too, huh?" Rachel took the mask from me and set it back. "An alien dressing as an alien? Come on now."

"Hey look." Tobias called from the other side of the aisle. I followed his voice and was greeted by a whole aisle of colorful costumes. All of food.

"Oh man." Rachel's jaw dropped.

"Intriguing. . ." I stooped over a red M&M costume.

"Ice cream cone? Dressing up as an ice cream cone? You've got to be kidding me." Tobias said in awe.

"Oh hey, a cheeseburger costume."

"Is that a hot dog costume?"

"A Mac N Cheez suit? Whoa."

"Tobias! Rachel! I have found my costume!" I called. There it was, lying on top of a cupcake suit. Complete with brown "tights" and light brown textures. Coiled into the perfect sugary confection.

A cinnamon bun costume.

"No way. . ."

Rachel picked up the bag, checked the size, and looked me over. "Yeah, this will definitely fit you."

"We're getting him a cinnabon costume?" Tobias demanded.

"Why not?"

"It's scented. Who's gonna stop him from eating himself?"

"I assure you both, I will not be consuming any of myself, thank you." I huffed.

Rachel shrugged. "Well Tobias, it's either this, the belly dancing outfit, or Bill Clinton."

"The cinnamon bun suits me." I repeated.

Tobias rolled his eyes. "Okay, cinnamon bun it is."

I gathered my new costume up in my arms. Then Rachel took Tobias's arm. "Come on, it's our turn now."

"You're kidding. We're teenagers!" Tobias tried to pull away.

"So is Ax."

"That's different. He's never done this before."

Rachel put her hands on her hips. "Have you?" she demanded.

"I - well, I've seen it - " Tobias turned red.

"Well, you're going to do it now."

"Rach - "

Rachel dragged Tobias by his arm. He shot me a pleading look, but 10 minutes later Rachel had found a vampire costume for Tobias. He whined.

"Oh quit being a baby."

"You're the one forcing me to go trick or treating."

"Tobias, no one should go without trick-or-treating at least once."

Tobias crossed his arms. "Well what about you?"

Rachel shrugged. "Didn't see anything I liked."

I had wandered a few feet away and came across a brown garment, clearly for a female. It came with some sort of round throwing weapon. "Xena."

Tobias looked at me, the costume, then back at Rachel. She crossed her arms indignantly.

"No."

"Come on."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Marco will find it wayy too easy."

"So?"

"No."

"Rachel, please. I'm trick-or-treating tomorrow to make you stop nagging. You might as well make it a compromise."

Rachel snorted. "I don't nag." Then she looked at the leather skirt. "Fine, but we are steering clear of Jake and Marco's neighborhood. Heck, even Cassie's neighborhood will be off limits."

"Deal."

And our Halloween preparations were complete.

- - - How was it? Good? Bad? Offensive? So crappy that I should be thrown into a trashcan and launched to Mars for even THINKING I should post it? Please tell me. Review! The last chapter will be posted on Hallowen (October 31) and if anyone knows about another Animorph Halloween story, could you please tell me about it so I can read it and make sure I don't re-do anything? 


	2. Gimme Candy!

DISCLAIMER: Not Animorphs mine the. Applegate Scholastic and K.A. them own. Sue poor don't me I'm. Nice have day a!

NOTE: Okay, chapter two. Not much happens here, but the action will come soon, I promise!

Rachel - 

It was October 31st Halloween. Unfortunately this year it fell on a school day, so all day I had to tolerate people jumping out of corners and grabbing me, trying to scare me. It took a couple choice words and a few punches in the chest to get the message through their thick skulls. It took a lot more than fake blood and severed eyeballs to scare me. 

After last period I caught up with Jake.

"Jake I need a favor."

"No. I am not taking your little sisters trick-or-treating." He said immediately.

"Oh come on. What are you going to do tonight then?" I demanded.

Jake rubbed his chin. "Hanging out with Marco."

"Take him with you then."

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

I crossed my arms and sighed. " I was hoping it didn't have to come to this. . . but remember that picture Marco took of you checking to see if you had chest hairs? The one he said he would use as blackmail someday?"

His jaw dropped. "I destroyed that picture days ago."

"Ah, but not the negatives. Marco carelessly left them in his backpack at Cassie's barn. I happened to come upon the said negatives. . ."

"You wouldn't" Jake gasped.

"Wouldn't I? I think Cassie needs a little entertainment, don't you?" I raised an eyebrow and put up a smug grin.

Jake's shoulders drooped. "Why didn't you just ask Cassie?"

"She's gonna be glued to the TV all night watching a documentary on the vampire bat and other misunderstood creatures." I rolled my eyes.

"I cannot believe you're blackmailing me."

"Neither can I, but you pushed me. All I wanted was a favor."

"Fine. I'll do it."

"Promise?"

He nodded glumly.

I patted him on the back. "Thanks, cuz. I owe you one."

"What's so important that you're resorting to blackmailing and ditching your own family?"

I laughed. "I'm going with Tobias to take Ax trick or treating."

Jake's jaw dropped. "That could be dangerous."

"Relax. I'll be there."

"That's why it'll be dangerous. Be careful." He started to walk away. "Don't let Ax eat the candy in public." Then he suddenly swiveled around. "Hey, I want those negatives."

"Oh. I don't have them, I showed them to Marco and he threw them away two days ago." I smiled sweetly. Jake's mouth opened and closed noiselessly. "Oh please, like I would ever resort to real blackmail. See you at my house by 6, you promised!" 

I walked away happily, leaving Jake in the hallway gaping like a fish. After going outside, instead of hopping a bus, I turned a left and made my way straight to the park. People were setting up party decorations for Halloween parties that would keep everyone up late tonight. But I wasn't there to see them. I entered the forest discreetly, being careful not to look suspicious. After a few minutes of walking. . .

Hey Rachel, you've GOT to see this! Tobias called from the sky. I smiled and jogged toward were I knew Ax's scoop was. There was Ax in human form, standing awkwardly in a skintight brown leotard.

"I feel highly uncomfortable." Ax said.

I barked out a laugh. "You want to come to my gymnastics class with me, Ax?"

He looked frightened. "Flipping and spinning carelessly through the air without wings with only a thin mat of cushion to prevent instant death or permanent paralysis? No I think not."

We laughed and helped the cinnamon bun part of the costume on him. Soon he was a big huge bun with a neck and head, arms, and legs sticking out. 

"Wait hold on." I grabbed the white icing cap and put it on his head. "Perfect."

"I feel delicious." Ax commented. 

Yeah, well, you're a cinnamon bun, Ax.

"Why is he getting dressed now? We can't go for like 3 hours." I asked. Ax would only have two hours to roam the streets in search of candy.

He was bugging me all day to try it on. He said it would be 'most beneficial'.

"Really?"

Oh yeah, that and I had to stop him from sniffing the thing somehow.

"I was not sniffing. I was inspecting." Ax corrected. He practiced walked around. To my surprise he got the hang of the limited walked quickly. "This is actually easier. The cinnamon bun portion can act as padding if I fall."

Then you'd go rolling down the street with a vampire and Xena chasing after you. Tobias joked.

I laughed at the image.

After helping Ax out of his cinnamon bun, I went home to check in with my mom and sisters. My mom would be home all night, but she had to work on a case, so I was supposed to take the Terror Twins trick-or-treating. I gathered them to the side to tell them that they would be going with Jake.

"Rachel, Rachel, can I wear the bloody eyeball?" Sara jumped up and down. I stared at her.

"But you're going to be a ballerina."

"Ballerina's can't have bloody eyeballs?"

"Rachel, we can't go with Jake!" Jordan whined.

"Why not?"

"Cuz my friends think Jake is cute and that's gross!" she declared.

"Marco will be there." I told her.

"Oh. Well, you've probably got something to do , right?"

And that was that. I told me my mom the arrangements and she nodded impatiently.

"Have fun, girls."

I helped Jordan into her hippie costume and squeezed Sara into her tutu. Then I put Sara on a chair so I can fasten on the severed eyeball. "There you go. Now wait in the living room for Jake."

A few minutes later the doorbell rang. I opened the door and saw Jake in a hobo costume he had pbviously thrown together 5 minutes ago, and Marco dressed as a hockey player.

"Ahh! Rachel take off that mask before I pee in my pants!" Marco shrieked and covered his face. Jake laughed.

"Ha ha. Thank you for spouting the oldest and corniest joke in human history." I said. Then I ushered Jordan out. Marco cringed.

"Hiiii Marco." Jordan said shyly.

"Let's go, let's go, let's go!" Sara squealed, jumping into Jake's arms.

"Ahh!" Jake almost dropped her when he saw the eyeball hanging from her face.

"A ballerina with a severed eyeball." Marco observed. "Yep, this is Rachel's sister."

I stuck out my tongue. "They need to be home by 8. Don't lose them or I'll hunt you down and feed you to some big alien or something."

Jake nodded. "Will do. And remember, no word -"

"About the deviously embarrassing picture of Jake searching for - " Marco began

"Shut up!" Jake hissed.

"So Xena, what are you going to be dressed as tonight?" Marco asked. "A genie to grant the wishes of that oh so special someone who happens to have feathers?"

I glared and nudged Jordan closer to Marco. "Have fun you guys." And I shut the door.

I walked up to my room and stared at the fake leather clothes I was going to be wearing tonight.

"Good grief, why did I agree to buying this again?" I reluctantly put it on and looked at myself in the mirror. I refused to admit to myself that I kind of liked it. 

"Bye mom!" I called at her closed office door. I heard a mumbled "Bye, honey!" and grabbed my jacket. I opened my door and was greeted by Tobias in full vampire uniform, about to ring my doorbell. Behind him stood a very big cinnamon bun. Ax had darkened his face with I hoped was brown makeup to match his costume. I could barely tell it was him. Tobias had done something similar, except he chalked his face white. He grinned a sharp toothed grin.

"Told you it'd look good." Tobias said.

"Shut up."

Ax looked into my house. "Where is the candy?"

"Ax, we went over this. You say trick or treat." Tobias sighed.

"What if she picks trick? She will trick me."

Tobias and I stared at each other blankly.

"It's okay Ax, here. I grabbed a Mr. Goodbar from the basket next to my door and handed it to Ax. He eyed it greedily, but obediently put it in his plastic pumpkin. "Alright, let's do this."

We led Ax to my neighbor's house and rung the doorbell. Mrs. Loftus answered it with a huge smile on her face. She saved this face for greeting children during Halloween. I remember bursting out in tears when I first saw it.

"Trick or Treat." Ax enunciated clearly, like he was giving a presidential speech.

"Oh, a cinnabon! How creative! And a vampire, how scary. And Rachel. . .are you an circus dancer?"

Tobias laughed. I made a face at him. "Sure, Mrs. Loftus."

"Trick or Treat." Ax said urgently.

Mrs. Loftus gave a kind nice-old-lady chuckle. "How bout a trick?" Mrs. Loftus joked.

"Ah, well, I have prepared for any misfortune you might cause me, so it would be most beneficial if you just refrained from trying to trick me." Ax said. Mrs. Loftus stared at him, then at me.

"He's Canadian." I explained. Mrs. Loftus looked bewildered, but gave us a Hershey bar each before shutting the door in our faces.

"That went okay. . ." Tobias said.

"I guess we won't be getting fresh-baked cookies from her this Christmas. . ."

"Ax? Ax, where's Ax!?" 

I swiveled around. He was gone! "How the heck did he get away, he could barely walk!" 

"There he is!" Tobias darted down to the sidewalk. I followed. Ax was standing under a street lamp, surrounded by a bunch of 4th graders.

"Give it back!" a blond boy dressed as Spongebob Squarepants yelled.

"I said trick or treat!" Ax told him in a calm tone. "That is the tradition."

"You suck!" a little red-headed Wonder Woman grabbed Ax's bun and started to unravel it, causing Ax to spin.

"What are you doing?"

"Gimme back my candy!" Spongebob screeched.

"Freak!" another kid yelled.

Tobias grabbed Ax. "Sorry kids!"

"Yeah, Ax-uh-Philip sick. He hasn't taken his medication." I explained, prying the little girl's fingers off Ax. Tobias tossed his Hershey bar at Spongebob. 

"Here you can have my candy."

"Mine too." I gave Wonder Woman my chocolate. They smiled at us, and Wonder Woman kicked me in the leg. Then they ran away.

"Owww, I didn't even DO anything!"

"Your youth are very disturbed." Ax grumbled, gathering up his unraveling costume.

Tobias shook his head. "Ax, you only ask people in the houses. Those kids are trick or treaters like us. They get candy."

"If they had asked me trick or treat, I would have gladly given them mine." Ax huffed.

"Hey looks, it's Jake and Marco." Tobias said, looking over my shoulder. I followed his line of sight and saw Jake, carrying Sara, and Marco being dragged along by Jordan.

"Ohh, no. Marco canNOT see me dressed as Xena." I said. I tugged Tobias and Ax into a bush.

"Owww, hey. There are thorns in this bush!" Tobias complained.

"Okay, wait." I stuck my head out and scared a 7 year old to death. He wore a leather mask on his face. "Hey, kid, I'll give you five bucks for that mask.". He looked at the Lincoln and fingered his mask. Then he whipped it off and handed it to me. I paid him.

"Jeez, Rachel." Tobias said. "Did you just haggle with a first grader?"

"You guys distract those two while I sprint down to the other side of the street. Meet you in front of number 43." Tobias nodded and helped drag Ax, who was like an overturned turtle, out of the bush. I heard them meet up with Jake, Marco, and my sisters.

"A cinnamon bun? Are you for real!?" I heard Marco say. I took the chance and sprinted out of the bush and into the shadows of the other side of the street. A couple minutes later Tobias and Ax walked up.

"Ax told them you had to leave to perform bodily functions." Tobias laughed.

"Great. Well, let's go to this house." I motioned at number 43. The lights were on, but there were no halloween decorations.

"Maybe we should skip this one, actually." I said.

"Come on, we just skipped like 4 houses so you could run away, lsets just go here." Tobias went up the stairs, Ax following quickly behind.

"Since when were you all pro trick-or-treating?"

"I'm not. I just want to get this night over with." Tobias turned to Ax. "Remember, say "trick-or-treat" then "thank you". That's all."

"Of course." Ax said impatiently. "I wouldn't do anything that would reveal I was - "

The door swung open and a short but heavily muscled bald guy with a gray beard answered the door. And he didn't look friendly.

"You were a what?" he asked.

- - - Ok if that isn't the crappiest cliffie-wannabe ever, I dunno what is. But I'm not done yet, so please don't abandon me. I might update sooner than just once a week, in order to get this thing done by Halloween. Okay, there were already a lot of reviews for the first chapter, so I can't respond to each one. But thanks for reviewing and I Swear, I read all of them!


	3. Those Nutty Canadians!

DISCLAIMER: I'm starting to think owning the Animorphs is a hopeless cause. I'm gonna start saving up for the Egyptian pyramids! **does the Egyptia walk dance thing**

NOTE: Well, it's a week til Halloween so I think I'll be bustin out chapters every other day or so. Like rapid-fire Animorphs. thanks all for the reviews. Again, I don't think I can respond to each one. But hey, I think you are all very pretty.

Tobias - 

"Canadian!" I blurted out way to loudly. Rachel stared at me, but Ax smiled.

"Yes I am Canadian. Nuh."

The grumpy man shook his head and glared at us like we were scum in his bathroom tiles. "So what do you kids want?"

"Trick or treat." Ax enunciated.

"Yeah. Trick or treat." Rachel echoed.

The man looked murderous and I almost dragged Ax and Rachel down back to the street, but man turned around and went into his kitchen. He came out with a box of Special K cereal. He plunged his hand in the box and came out with a handful of flakes. He poured it into Ax's bag. Ax stared in awe and confusion. Then he did the same to Rachel, who looked angry. 

"Now get out of here."

"Listen, punk. It's Halloween. What the hell is the big idea? You give CANDY on Halloween, not some old people CEREAL! This is their first time trick or treating." Rachel fumed. "Come on , seriously, who stuck the bitch stick up YOUR ass and twisted??"

"Ookay, time to go!" I yelped cheerfully and I grabbed Rachel's shoulder. "Have fun watching - " I glanced at the TV " - Star Trek. Cool, is the Enterprise?"

Ax snorted. "Clearly it is a Hawjbran fighter." He muttered.

I nudged Ax in the ribs. "Well, we oughta get going."

But the man grabbed Ax's bun. "What did you say?"

Ax looked frightened. "I said nothing."

I wanted to run. Run far far away. But the man still had an iron grip on Ax.

"You're not one of us." The man stated.

"What are you talking about." Rachel said dismissively. Then she grabbed Ax too. "Let's go. Now."

"Andalites!" the man hissed. The controller looked at the street behind us, littered with kids and their parents.

"I'm sorry, what?" I tried to play it off.

"Andalites!!"

"Run!" Rachel hissed. She performed a very impressive high kick on the man's wrist. I could've sworn I heard something crack. The controller howled. We both grabbed either of Ax's arms and half dragged-half rolled him down the steps. Ax yelped each time he hit a bump. 

When I looked back, the controller was gone from the door, but I guessed he was calling for backup or something. He was going to tell his fellow yeerks that a cinnabon, a chalky vampire, and Xena with a leather mask were really a bunch of Andalites trick-or-treating. 

"They're going to find us. Every controller in the state will be on a lookout now." I said erratically. My heart was pounding in my chest. We were fugitives. 

"I'm sorry." Ax said sadly. "It is my fault."

"Wait, they don't know it's us." Rachel breathed.

"What?" 

"You're whiter than a sheet, Ax's face is all brown and gross, and I'm still wearing this mask I got from the kid." Rachel pointed. "We just need to take off our costumes."

"Where? they'll see us!"

"There." Rachel pointed at a patch of woods by the road. It stretched all the way to Cassie's neighborhood.

"Let's go." We dragged Ax along until we were out of view from the street.

"Okay, I think Ax you and Tobias morph owl or something." Rachel said.

"What about you?"

"Someone needs to stay human and carry these costumes out. We can't just leave them here with our prints all over them!"

"Okay." We helped Ax wrestle out from his bun. He was able to morph Andalite with the brown leotard as a morphing suit. I stripped to my own morphing outfit and returned to red tailed hawk form.

Rachel looked down at her Xena costume. "I need to change, this is pretty obvious."

Then change. Fast.

"I'm not wearing anything under."

What!?

Rachel rolled her eyes in the dark. "It's a leather skirt, duh. What was I gonna wear under, long johns? Turn around, I'm putting on your vampire pants, Tobias."

Like a gentleman I turned away on the tree. I made Ax turn too. A few minutes later, Rachel said "Done!". We turned around and saw Rachel wearing my baggy black pants and her jacket zipped all the way up. She had all of our costumes wrapped up in my vampire cape.

You cannot go out carrying those, the controllers will see. Ax said.

"Right. So I was thinking we walk through these woods all the way to Cassie's barn and stash them there."

That's almost a mile away!

"You got a better idea?" Rachel dared. We didn't, so Ax and I flew overhead, watching for anything that might stop Rachel from running through the woods. It seemed the only thing stopping her was my pants, which kept tripping her because they were so big. I had gotten them out of a construction site, so they probably belonged to some big huge construction worker. But I didn't think Rachel needed to know that.

Suddenly we saw several lights up ahead. 

Tobias what is that?

I don't know. But I hear noises and Rachel's running straight towards it. Rachel, stop!

Rachel skidded to a halt. She looked up at us curiously and mouthed "what?"

There's something going on up there, don't move. We'll check it out. 

Rachel leaned on a tree impatiently. 

Ax and I hovered over the source of the lights and noises. Below us were several lanterns, lots of college kids, and lots and lots of beer. Lots. A huge stereo was blaring loud rock music.

Oh crap, it's a frat party. I moaned.

What is a frat party? As asked.

When a bunch of older teenagers get drunk and do stupid things. I replied. We need to get Rachel away from here. I watched as half of the people started dancing drunkenly and chugging more beer. I bet even Rachel could hear the yells and music now. Around the perimeter or the party couple had paired off and prepared to do the unspeakable with each other in the woods. On the other side perpendicular to where Rachel waited, I saw two very familiar guys walking towards the source of the craziness.

"I'm telling you, Jake. College party? There is gonna be SO many chicks up in there!"

What the - Marco?

Prince Jake? 

They both immediately shot their eyes up towards us. I landed on a nearby branch.

What are you doing here Prince Jake and Marco? Tobias tells me they are doing stupid things there. Ax said.

"I was - uh. . ." Jake looked sheepish. Marco rolled his eyes.

"Gee, MOM, we weren't doing anything."

Well you're about to. We messed up trick-or-treating - 

"You WHAT?" Marco exclaimed.

And now we're pretty sure every controller in the city is on the lookout for a vampire, a cinnabon, and Xena in a leather mask. I continued.

"You WHAT!?!?!?" Jake yelled. "Where's Rachel?"

"Hold up, Rachel was XENA?" Marco interrupted.

Come on. We flew back to were we left Rachel, with Marco and Jake running behind us.

She's not there. Ax reported.

What?

Are you sure this is the tree?

Yeah, I know this tree! I knew every patch of forest in this area like the back of my, well, wing.

"Get away from me, you LOSER!"

Rachel!

We dodged the branches of the trees, since we couldn't see into the woods from above the leaves. Soon we came upon Rachel and a guy twice her size leering over her.

"Come on baby, why'd you come if you didn't want it?" the guy slurred his words. He had a beer in his left hand. He made a move to brush up against her. I prepared to scratch the guys face off.

"Screw you." Rachel brought her knee up and connected with his baby-makers.

"AHHHH!" the guy cried out and collapsed, spilling his beer on Rachel and clutching his groin. Rachel grabbed something shiny from the guys belt loop and threw it deep into the woods.

"No way are YOU driving, stupid jerk." She said. Then she scanned the trees for us.

We're here, Rachel. Nice job by the way. I said.

"Hey XENA." Marco stumbled into the clearing. 

"Oh wonderful." She moaned.

"What happened?" Jake demanded.

Rachel, Ax and I told him what happened. Jake looked furious. "I knew this was a bad idea."

"Wait a sec, where the hell are my sisters?" Rachel asked.

"Sara got tired and I left Jordan with a group of her friends."

"You ditched your COUSIN for a FRAT PARTY!?" Rachel cried. 

Jake's angry expression wavered for a second while he looked embarrassed. "She's fine. Anyway, we have more important things to deal with. Like say, an alien around every corner who wants to kill us."

We should keep going to Cassie's to hide our stuff. I indicated the bundle of costumes. 

"I have got to see the leather skirt." Marco said unhelpfully.

Wait. Someone's coming. Ax said suddenly.

"You think the Andalites are hiding at that party?" I heard a voice say.

"Let's check these woods. I'll bet the entire Sulp Niar pool that they are here."

Jake looked at us. "No time to morph." He whispered.

"Then we do things the old fashioned way." Marco said. "RUN!"


	4. Dammit Marco!

DISCLAIMER: **walks up to the scholastic president seductively and holds out a pretty apple. Seductively. Smiles. Seductivley. He calls security, who escorts the freak from the building.**

NOTE: Okay, I have 4 days til Halloween. Next chapter up tomorrow! Nothing more to say…Except to answer one question, in Ch.2 Rachel said Cassie was at home watching documentaries on the vampire bat and other misunderstood animals. 

Marco - 

I could already hear the controllers stomping through the dead leaves. I wanted to scream at sheer insanity of it all. Seriously, it was Halloween. We were supposed to have fun. How Tobias, Rachel, and Ax screwed that up was beyond me. I could be at a frat party right now! Drunk college chicks all over the place! It was a gold mine! Sure, you're supposed to have your share of fun thrills and scares, but you aren't supposed to be chased through the woods by body-snatching, laser gun-toting aliens with a hobo, two birds, and a girl in size 60 pants.

"Where the hell are we going." I gasped.

"Cassie's." Rachel said.

No way you'll be able to beat those guys. I count six of them coming from three different directions. You're heading straight for a pair of them! Tobias announced. 

"We have to go to the party." I whispered.

"We're about to be caught by the yeerks and all you could think about are drunken hussies at a frat party?" Rachel demanded incredulously. 

I almost stopped and giggled. "Hussies?"

"Shut up."

"No, Marco's right. We might be able to lose them at this party." Jake said. "Tobias, left, right?"

Yeah, veer left. Actually no, don't veer. Sharp left, NOW!

The three of us changed directions all at once, causing everyone to fall on top of each other. 

Go go GO!

We bolted, leaving behind an obvious hole in the cluster of leaves. 

"They were here! Look!" a deep voice bellowed.

"After them!"

You are almost at the party. Ax informed us. We already heard the loud thumping music up ahead. We also heard various happy shrieks and yells. Finally we burst into the clearing. There were two barbeque grills cooking burgers and paper lanterns in the shape of pumpkins hanging from lines strung from trees. A big sound system was on full power and there were lots of cars parked in a circle, surrounding it all. To the side was an entire wall of kegs filled with beer. A pirate was manning the kegs, looking to drunk to even turn the spigot. All around us were costumed college kids, bumping, grinding, making out, and leading each other away to the shadows. 

"Can't believe I'm missing this." I complained.

"Like these people would ever give you the time of day." Rachel sneered.

You guys, the controllers are coming. Tobias called. Behind we saw two angry, tired guys in gas station uniforms. They each carried a Dracon beam openly. IT didn't matter though, none of these people wouldn't have noticed if they had been carrying chainsaws.

"Yeah, baby let's go!" a very, very, VERY good-looking brunette in a Cleopatra outfit rubbed up against Jake. He blushed and backed away.

"Uh, no thanks. We gotta go." He stammered.

"Who you here with, hottie?" she asked seductively. Then her eyes fell on Rachel. "Oh."

"NO!" Jake and Rachel yelled. Jake backed away from Rachel and fell into me.

Cleopatra looked at Jake and me. "Ohhhh." She winked and started to walk away.

"NO! WE'RE NOT - " It was too late. Jake had me branded. "Dammit, Jake."

"Forget about it. We have to get out of here without drawing attention to those guys." He pointed at four more tired-looking guys who were scanning the party. We ducked into the dancing mass of bodies.

Despite the hilarity of that scene, I think you guys should REALLY get a move on. Tobias warned.

We started to weave through the dancing people. They breathed at us, giving us a nice whiff of their gross beer breath. 

Not that way! Ax yelled.

I smacked right into a guy holding a dracon beam.

"You. Kid. Have you seen a big cinnamon bun walking around? Or a girl in a leather skirt?" he asked me gruffly. I glanced discreetly and saw Jake standing in front of Rachel, keeping her out of view.

"Seen lots of people around. Lots of freaks up in here." I said.

He stared at me. I grinned stupidly back up at him. Then he pushed me aside and continued searching the crowd. I breathed a sigh of relief. 

"Lets go." Jake pulled me and Rachel along. 

"Wait! I dropped the - " Rachel started.

"I FOUND SOMETHING!" a controller yelled. The others shoved their way over. I looked at what they were staring at. A white icing cap. Ax's icing cap.

"They're here." 

"Bail!" Jake hissed. We continued to push our way through all the college kids, but it was like trying to breaking through a wall of Jell-O with a strand of thread. Not happening.

You guys, they found something. You really need to hurry. Tobias said.

"Gee, you think?" I muttered.

More controllers are coming. Ax said. A lot.

I heard a girl yell. "Hey, how come all of you have ray guns?"

We looked in front of us. There was a wall cars. We weren't going to get away on foot. There were way to many controllers. And we couldn't morph. It was our only chance. I poked Jake and pointed to the cars.

"Oh, no."

"You got a better idea?" 

"What?" Rachel followed my line of sight. "Damn."

"I call driver's seat." I ran over to a red Ford Explorer.

"You call shotgun." Rachel said to Jake.

"Only if they have airbags."

"Come ON!"

Guys, if you're going to steal a car, do it NOW! Tobias said.

I found the key still in the car door. "Idiot frat guys."

Rachel and Jake piled into the car and made sure to fasten their seatbelts. I started the car.

VROOOOOM!

"Dude, that's my car!" a drunk guy with a haircut like 3 mohawks yelled.

"Careful, don't hit anyone." Jake warned me. "We could do without manslaughter right now."

I checked the mirror. All clear. "Relax. Enjoy the ride." I stomped the accelerator and we went shooting backwards. There was a huge CRUNCH and we stopped. 

"DAMMIT MARCO!" Jake and Rachel screamed.

What the HELL? Tobias yelled.

Marco, are you aware that you just slammed into a tree backwards? Ax asked.

"Oops."

"There they are! The Andalites!" a controller roared.

"Dammit, Marco!"

I gunned the engine and swerved left onto the dirt road.

"Ow! That was my head, you idiot." Rachel whined, rubbing a red mark on her forehead from when she hit it against the window.

TSEEEEWWW! TSEEEEWWWW!

BAM! SCREEEEEEEEEEEcH!!!!

"Why the hell did we let Marco drive?" Rachel demanded.

"It's not me! They're shooting at our tires!" I cried. 

There are two motorcycles pursuing you. Ax reported. They are going rather slow, but now that you do not have tires . . .

That was the screeching noises. Our metal rims were scraping against the rock and dirt.

"They can't see us right now. Marco, open the windows." Jake said.

I opened them. "Now what?"

"I'll take the wheel."

"What? Why?"

"I need you and Rachel to morph flies and fly out the windows while I drive full speed to the next telephone pole. The controllers might follow, and if they don't at least the costumes will be destroyed in the explosion. Nothing they could trace back to us."

"Are you insane!?" I demanded.

"You'll blow up too, genius!" Rachel said.

"No, if I go full speed I can let of the accelerator and morph too, before I hit the pole."

"Are you insane?!" I demanded again.

"Just do it!" A red beam shot past my cheek and made a small hole in the windshield.

"No. You morph. I'll drive." I said. 

"Marco, stop - "

"Jake, I'm not moving. You better go - "

I swerved as a beam hit a front tire and the car tilted.

You guys, what are you doing? You're almost at the highway! You can't drive into the highway! Tobias yelled.

"GO!" Jake looked at Rachel. 

"Morph."

Rachel's face began to turn dark and her eyes became faceted. The same changes were happening with Jake. Within a few minutes they were gone. 

AHHHH! I heard Rachel yell. I almost had a heart attack.

Don't worry, Marco. It was just the air. You were going pretty fast and we were both blown like a billion miles. Jake said. Good luck.

I guess Jake and Rachel told Tobias and Ax what I was doing, because I heard Tobias go, Are you INSANE!?

Marco, you are almost at the highway, you must destroy the vehicle before you get there. Three more telephone poles ahead. Ax said.

I aimed and let go of the accelerator and started my morph. My head changed first, and soon my vision got blurry, but before it did, I saw glanced at the speedometer. 110 miles per hour.

Get out, Marco, get out! Tobias yelled.

But I wasn't morphed yet. If I jumped out now, I'd kill myself.

Marco, you've got like 2 seconds!

I put my hands on the window and prepared to launch my almost-fly body out.

Marco NOW!

I saw the telephone pole rush at me. I jumped out, and hoped to God I was a fly and I wouldn't get killed in the blast.


	5. Dammit JAKE!

DISCLAIMER: Short and quick for now-I don't own this shizznit.

NOTE: Okay, this chapter may seem kinda rushed and stuff. That would be because it was. LoL. Anyway, next and last chapter up on FRIDAY!

Jake - 

What happened? What's going on? I yelled. I was a fly. A fly who could only make out the speeding headlights in the highway nearby. Other than that, I couldn't see anything else. I couldn't see whether Marco had made it out of the car. And I couldn't see the explosion as the car hit the telephone pole. 

But I definitely felt it. I don't know how far away I was, but I felt the heat. I heard the controllers scream..

"AHHHHHHHH!"

"Pull over! Pull over!" 

HOLY CRAP! Tobias cried.

What? WHAT!?

Holy crap holy crap holy crap holy crap!

Tobias, what the hell happened? Rachel demanded.

The car has collided with the telephone pole. There was an explosion and the motorcycles driven by the controllers halted before crashed into the fire. Ax reported. And Marco - 

Hey folks, what's shakin?

MARCO!

No duh. I told you I could drive. Marco snorted. His fly body was making figure eights in the sky gleefully.

I felt the weight being pulled off my chest. If he hadn't made it, if he hadn't gotten out of the car quick enough, it would've been my fault. I shouldn't have let him drive into the pole.

Shh, shut up. Rachel said. We listened to the controllers. Tobias and Ax had flown out of sight, but no doubt still in earshot.

"Go look inside." One controller said.

"No, you do it." The other replied. 

"Coward."

"I don't see you hurrying over, Gremlak." The second one accused.

"Fine." The first controller cautiously approached the flaming car. "There's no sign of anything."

"Nothing? No one"

"No. They must have escaped." Gremlak looked uncomfortable.

They looked at each other nervously. "Do you think the Visser has been notified?"

"I don't think so. We should tell the others not to report anything until we actually have the Andalites in our custody."

"Sounds good to me. Now let's get out of here before the human ambulance. We'll tell the others in the forest to keep searching. You go to the Pool and tell everyone not to report anything." They started their motorcycles and sped off. I could already hear the sirens.

Okay, we still have to be careful. They're not stopping the search. I reminded them.

I guess we don't have to go to Cassie's. Rachel said.

Wait. Ax said suddenly. Over there.

Naturally, as a fly, I had no idea what he was talking about. Tobias filled us in.

There's a group of the controllers heading to the first house out of the forest! 

Cassie! Rachel realized.

Let's go! Rachel, Marco, hang on to either Ax or Tobias. You guys, try not to be seen. Go! I clung to some feathers on Tobias's chest. Rachel and Marco did the same on Ax.

Hey Rachel. Didn't know you wanted to share a bird with me. Marco joked.

Rachel sighed. Wait, Jake. I have to switch to Tobias. 

Oh, so you want to cling to the chest of your - 

You GUYS. Shut up, and let's GO!

I was instantly pressed against Tobias's chest as he darted over the dirt road to Cassie's farm. Tobias told us that we would beat the controllers there by a couple minutes. We had to warn her, just in case she let something slip. 

Okay, we're sitting in her roof gutter. What do we do? Tobias asked.

Go around back and tap at her window. I told him. Her parents aren't home, are they? There's no truck in the driveway.

Nope. Rachel confirmed.

TAP TAP TAP.

Cassie! It's us! 

I heard several vibrations as Cassie came running to her back door. She swung the door open and Tobias and Ax blew in and landed on her table.

"What happened? Oh my God, something happened." Her eyes widened.

No, no, no. Well, not really. Rachel said. 

We'll tell you later. First, we have to tell you that several controller are about to knock on your door. I informed her.

And they aren't dressed as little princesses or mummies. Marco added.

"What!?"

They're looking for Rachel, Tobias, and Ax. - 

"WHAT!?"

They got caught, but they had their costumes on so they wouldn't recognize them. Still, you have to make sure to tell them you know NOTHING about a girl and two guys trick or treating as a cinnabon, Xena, and a vampire. Or about a bunch of kids crashing a frat party and stealing a car. I finished.

"WHAT!?!?" Cassie's voice rose from a whisper of bewilderment to a shriek of disbelief. "I can't believe - ". 

DING-DONG.

She stared at us, wide-eyed. Then she pointed at her open backdoor. "You guys can't stay here! I'll tell them off, but they can't see a red-tailed hawk in my kitchen!" Tobias and Ax quickly fluttered out the door. Before Cassie shut the door, Rachel, Marco and I dislodged from their feather and joined Cassie in her house. She closed the door quietly.

DING-DONG.

"Coming!" she called in a voice that sounded like she just inhaled a tank of helium. She made it to the front door and opened it breathlessly, making sure to keep the chain lock in place. She smiled at the 3 controllers who had their Dracon beams cleverly concealed somewhere.

"Hello, little girl - " I sat on a nearby lampshade and saw Cassie almost snicker at this. " - this is very important. We're looking for three teenagers. A girl dressed in a leather skirt, a boy wearing a cinnamon bun, and another boy wearing a vampire costume. Have you seen them anywhere?"

Cassie looked at them blankly. "No, I'm sorry."

"Are you sure? They didn't trick or treat or something in this area?"

"Not that I know of, no."

One of the controllers looked sternly at her. "Well if you do, please contact The Sharing. These teenagers are troublemakers, and The Sharing wants to help these kids. Okay?"

Cassie nodded obediently. "Yes sir."

I suddenly began to feel the heat of the lamp on my legs. I was on fire! I stifled a mental cry of pain and launched instinctively off the blazingly hot lampshade. And directly into the side of Cassie's face. 

I crashed into her cheek and fell on her shoulder, a little dazed. 

Jake, please tell me that wasn't you and I was just dreaming a fly crashing into Cassie's face. Marco moaned. Cassie looked horrified for a split second, but immediately replaced that look with a smile.

"Well, see ya."

"Wait." The controller stuck a hand in the door. "You sure have a lot of flies in your house." He looked at Marco, seated on a painting of a mountain, and at Rachel, who was stationary and almost camoflaged on the TV.

If I had whatever body parts it took to gulp, I would have.

"Excuse me?" Cassie asked innocently.

The controllers looked at her strangely.

"Are your parents home?"


	6. THE END

DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Okay?

NOTE: Here it is, the anti-climactic final chapter of THE HIP-HAPPENIN HALLOWEEN. Later, guys!

Ax - 

Damn. Rachel muttered.

"My parents are around someplace." Cassie lied. Tobias and I were perched in the high branches of a nearby tree. We had seen Jake fly into Cassie's face by mistake, which instantly set off the controllers' alarm. "But our barn is a Wildlife Rehabilitation Clinic. We get lots of flies."

"That's what's in that barn? Sick animals?" a controller said, leering at Cassie.

"Yes sir."

Tobias, I do not think the controllers will stop their interrogation unless they find their Andalites. I told him.

What are you saying?

We must distract them. Lead them away from Cassie.

Tobias's hawk eye glinted. Alright. I go first, since it's the red-tailed hawk that's on all their wanted posters.

They want a poster?

They know I'm a red-tailed hawk. 

I thought about it for a moment. You cannot just go. It would be too much of a coincidence. . .unless you were chased here. . .

That's it. I'll go get the attention of the other controllers and get them to chase me here. Be right back!. Tobias took off quickly into the forest. I stayed on the branch and hoped that Cassie would hold the controllers off long enough.

Cassie, we will lead them away shortly. Please be careful until then. I informed her.

"Listen, you guys must be tired. You guys want a quick drink or something before you go?" Cassie asked hospitably. 

The controllers looked at each other. "Sure."

Cassie, what the hell are you doing? Rachel demanded. Cassie formed her lips into a tight line.

I suspect she does not want the controllers to be suspicious, so she is showing that she has nothing to hide. I said. Cassie showed no indication that she'd heard.

Ohh. Good one Cass. One problem though, we're still here! If we go flying for cover, they'll know it's us! Marco exclaimed. 

Everyone just relax. Don't move. Just act like a fly. Move if they try to swat you. Prince Jake said.

Jake, where are you, by the way? Rachel asked.

Awkward silence.

Umm. . .well, after I hit Cassie in the cheek I kind of slid down her shirt. . .

Cassie looked alarmed.

"What happened?" a controller asked. They were now standing in her living room. The TV was still on, showing scenes of a white-faced human knifing young people to death while they engaged in their relations.

"I just remembered, I don't know if we have ice. Is warm-ish Coke okay?"

"That's fine."

SLAP! One of the controllers slapped at the TV with his hand. A fly zipped away, unharmed. Cassie started to have difficulty breathing.

Cassie, calm down. I told her.

That guy nearly removed my ass parts. Marco whined.

Your whole body is made of ass, Marco, don't worry sbout it. Rachel said hotly. Now quit flying around and land on something, for God's sake!

TSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!

"GET HIM!" Behind me Tobias swept from the trees, followed by a small band of controllers holding Dracon beams.

Ax, need a little help here! he cried and he zoomed past.

I launched from the branch and neared Cassie's house, making sure to emit as much noise as possible.

TSEEEEEEEEEEEEERR!!

"There's another one! Hurry up!" someone yelled.

The controllers in Cassie's house swiveled around unsteadily on their two human legs. "What's going on?"

Cassie peered out the door. "Hey, why are those guys chasing birds?"

The controllers stormed out of Cassie's house. "Thanks for the drinks, kid. But we've got to go!" I banked a sharp left, in the opposite direction of Tobias, and they ran after me.

Ax, where are you? Tobias yelled faintly.

I'm flying from these yeerks. I responded hastily. I flapped as fast as I could, everything below me blending into one long blur. My wings were tiring.

TSSSSSSSSSSEEEWWWWW!

They were firing at me! The yeerks could not catch up, so they were hoping to disable me and make me fall from the sky. I knew they would do their best not to kill me. I was a potential yeerk host.

TSSSSSEWWWW! TSSSSSEEEEEEWWW!

Ahh! I cried. The tip of my wing began to smoke. 

"We got him!"

No. Up ahead I saw lights. That meant that there would be several humans there and the yeerks wouldn't fire in front of them.. I had to make it there before they got a lucky shot at me. 

TSEEEEWW!

Arrrggghh! my talon sizzled. I was so close. . .

RRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAARRRR!

The noise alone almost knocked me out of the sky. Prince Jake!

"Andalite!" 

Prince Jake pounced at them, knocking all of them to the ground. The controllers cried out in pain and several Dracon beams were thrown away. Fortunately, Cassie's house was in a rural area and her neighbors lived far enough away to miss what was going on. 

Prince Jake! Where are the others?

Cassie and Marco are helping Tobias. Rachel is - 

Right here. A grizzly bear came thumping out of the woods. Together with Jake, she easily succeeded in knocking all of them unconscious. They deposited the limp bodies at the edge of the forest, where they would no doubt be discovered quickly.

Are you okay? Jake asked as I spiraled down, finally landing on a tree branch. I had to lean on the trunk, since m right leg was gone.

I am fine. What about Tobias?

I'm sure they're okay. We're going to regroup at your scoop. Jake stalked among the trees. This way, right?

Yes. 

We arrived at my scoop and waited for about twenty long, painstaking minutes. Then Tobias, Marco and Cassie showed up, all with their own slight injuries. 

"Halloween is the crappiest holiday ever." Marco muttered once he'd become human again. 

I morphed human and accompanied my friends to back Cassie's house, since we were all too tired to morph birds. We told Cassie the entire story on the way. Our story ended just as we reached her doorstep.

"You WHAT!?" she demanded. She had punctuated all of our sentences with the same exclamation.

"Whatever. It's over. I can finally just sit down. And I will never go trick or treating ever again. Ever." Rachel collapsed on the couch. I eyed a bowl with a few chocolates in it. I looked pleadingly at Cassie.

"Take it." 

I ripped open a candy and let the wondrous taste of chocolate fill my mouth. I shut my eyes to receive the full impact.

"Yo, he looks like he was just enlightened or something." Marco laughed at my expression.

"He was." Tobias sat down next to Rachel. "He realized that Halloween sucks."

"Hey, Cassie?" Rachel asked.

"What?" Cassie looked at Rachel curiously.

"You told me you would be watching documentaries on the vampire bat and other misunderstood animals the whole entire night."

We all turned to the TV, which was still on from earlier. The white-faced man with the knife was chasing another group of young humans. Cassie looked embarrassed. 

"Um, well. . ."

"You're such a liar."

They all laughed and I enjoyed my next piece of chocolate. For the next hour my friends watched the TV. They told me that people found the show scary and suspenseful and frightening. I found it rather pointless, but then again I still don't understand much of human culture. Violent movies, beer, frat parties, Star Trek . . .

. . .and Halloween. 

- - -And that's a wrap. Now I can start writing for THE UNTITLED again. I miss that story. . .HAPPY HALLOWEEN FOLKS!


End file.
